Woman who ‘really wants to get married’ plans to propose after 14 years, but one detail about her plan has commenters absolutely horrified

TikToker Estella (@est.ellita) recently shocked the internet after announcing she would propose to her boyfriend of 14 years. But what really got people upset was her plan to ask his father for a blessing after she proposes. While Estella is breaking traditional gender roles by proposing herself, which is great, the situation has started a huge online debate.

According to Bro Bible, Estella shared several TikToks about her proposal plan. Her most popular video got 8.6 million views before the big day. In the video, she talked about the negative comments she expected. She said she doesn’t care what people think because she loves him and knows he loves her.

“I really want to get married,” she said. “We’ve been together for 14 years already. He hasn’t proposed. I know he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. He says it all the time. And we’re in love even after this long, so why not?”

The internet thinks 14 years without a proposal means something

People on TikTok had strong opinions about her decision. Most comments pointed out that if a man truly wanted to marry a woman after 14 years, he would have already proposed. Fourteen years is a long time to wait for commitment, especially when you’ve made it clear you want marriage.

One user wrote, ““I really want to get married” well does HE?!” Another worried viewer wrote, “Girl where is your best friend somebody reach her asap” The reaction was similar to when a woman discovered something disturbing in her food and people rushed to warn her.

The most criticized part was Estella’s plan to ask her boyfriend’s father for his blessing. People found this strange since she was already doing the proposing. One viewer said, “Girl, please go live when you ask his dad for his blessing. I have to see that.” It seems odd to reverse gender roles but still follow traditional steps that feel like they should be done by the man.

TikToker Danisha Carter shared her thoughts on the situation. She said that while she considers herself progressive, some gender dynamics run deeper. Danisha argued that if someone hasn’t proposed after 14 years, especially when you’ve said you want marriage, “it’s not your sign to propose for him; it’s your sign to find somebody else.”

This situation shows what psychologists call the “sunk cost fallacy.” This means people continue with something they’ve already invested heavily in, even when giving up makes more sense. After spending over a decade in the relationship, Estella might feel she can’t walk away, which pushed her to propose instead.

Estella posted a follow-up video showing the actual proposal, which got 2.3 million views. She turned off the comments on that video. She later said the wedding is planned for January, but many people online remain doubtful. This wouldn’t be the first time a viral TikTok moment left viewers shocked by unexpected content.