A woman says her boyfriend blew up when she asked him to skip a guys-only Christmas party, despite weekly golf and a Mexico trip with those friends

A woman said her boyfriend chose a guys-only Christmas party over an annual potluck with mutual friends that they could have attended together. She wrote in a Reddit post that “his friends [sic] party is guys only, no girls or partners are invited,” as reported by Daily Dot. She said she wanted to celebrate at the potluck together, but her boyfriend prioritized his own friends.

The woman said the party was just one of several outings keeping them apart. Her boyfriend already had a bachelor party trip to Mexico planned with the same group of men three weeks before the Christmas event. The group was also scheduled to reunite for a New Year’s Eve wedding two weeks after the Christmas gathering, and she said everyone involved is in their mid-to-late 30s or early 40s.

She said she was upset about missing the potluck when her boyfriend already had plenty of time with his friends. She questioned why he needed another separate gathering between the Mexico trip and the wedding. According to her, he also played golf with these friends every week over the summer, and the group joined football and hockey pools with more gatherings that never included partners.

Asking him to skip the party did not go well

When she asked her boyfriend to skip the guys-only party and join her at the potluck, she claimed, “He blew up at me and told me I’m being unreasonable.” She then asked Reddit whether it was fair to want his company at an event that welcomed partners.

Commenters largely sided with the woman. One said their husband would never do this because he doesn’t want to be away from his family. Another questioned the party itself, writing, “Who has a dudes only holiday party?” and called the boyfriend immature. Other Reddit users have shared disputes over time spent with friends, including a woman whose boyfriend wanted a $2,600 trip with friends.

Disagreements over holiday plans are common among couples. In a DatingNews.com survey, 24% of respondents said holiday plans cause tension between them and their partners, and one in five said they have fought with their significant other over holiday plans. Nearly four in five said they compromise with their partner on holiday plans, while one in 10 said doing so makes them resent their partner. The survey also found 39% of respondents said being in a relationship has made the holidays more complicated.